Herman Cain Finally Calls It Quits In the Race for President
Matt | On 03, Dec 2011
Herman Cain has come to his senses in the race to bring the next U-Haul truck to 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue.
He has officially suspended his campaign for President of the United States.
However, Cain did not drop a bombshell on the American people on Saturday. Many observers suspected, or in some cases wanted, the former Godfather’s Pizza CEO to drop out of the race. The events of the past few weeks put a black eye on the Cain campaign. Once a front-runner, the “little Cain engine that could” ran out of gas and fell off the track. In this case, lots of people pointed and laughed when it happened.
You have to give the man credit for trying. On Thursday in South Carolina, he hyped up a “big announcement” to be made over the weekend. He wouldn’t give any details. The media stepped right in speculating that this was really the end for Cain. They were right.
“Im at peace with my God. Im at peace with my wife and she is at peace w/me,” Cain said to over 300 supporters and media that gathered at his Georgia headquarters outside of Atlanta.
Cain’s next political plans are unclear at this point. I’d like to speculate that we haven’t seen the end of him. He may pop up as a vice presidential candidate, Cabinet member, or business adviser. Anything could happen. He did unveil a website, The Cain Solutions, where he will continue to be a voice for the people.
As you may know, Cain was surging in the polls until women began coming out of the woodwork with sexual harassment allegations. His defense sounded much like his famous “9-9-9” tax plan … in this case it was “deny-deny-deny.” He was initially dinged in the polls, but he kept fighting through with decent debate performances and campaigning.
Then along came Ginger White.
Armed with her detailed cell phone billing statement, an attorney, and all the media hype that Atlanta’s FOX 5 could muster, Ginger dropped the motherload of a bombshell on Cain’s campaign. She claimed to be his 13-year on-and-off again mistress. Cain didn’t deny knowing her, admitted to helping her financially, and she told major media that their relationship was “sexual.” At that point, the music stopped playing, the piano closed, and people hit the nearest exit.
And that, folks, is how a presidential campaign can go from full-speed to nothing in a matter of weeks. Let me be the first to thank the Cain campaign for giving Prune Juice Media so much material to cast a side-eye on over all these months. ::bows::